I would be the first to tell you I am not much of a witchy witch. I have this crazy notion that all the other proper witches in the world are all sitting in moonbeams on hilltops mixing incence, or casting spells for world peace or making tasty magical soups. They all do full moon rituals to connect with goddess or whatever you do in a full moon ritual, and think deep thoughts.
I always forget about full moons, new moons, all moons really, and most sabbats. I usually do something about it at some point, so that’s OK. And hells no I don’t cook.
Rituals are a pretty witchy thing, right?
I did a ritual three weeks ago. Franchesca de Grandis (aka Queen of Awesome) wrote a fabulous 1 year training guide called Goddess Initiation and, five years after starting, I’ve almost completed it and performed the Third Road self initiation. Which means, I did an initiation ritual. Wahoo!
Dude, do I have problems committing to stuff. I can’t commit to a sandwich filling in sandwich shops with out five minutes of deep thought. Did you notice the five years to complete a years training thing? Doing this Initiation was a HMUGE thing for me, and I am very proud of myself. Third Road Priestess here, y’all. Woohoo!
I’m slowly figuring that witchcraft and Goddess has been in my life for almost ten years, so it’s probably not going away either. I put the Initiation off, and was very worried about it, but in essence, what Franchesca teaches is total sanity in every respect and I resonate and get really excited about almost everything she says. If it works AND it makes sense AND I am proud of it, where is the problem?
I’ve never really had an experience of a ritual that changed me for more than a week. I’ve done rituals for self-love when I have been at my most self-sabotagiset, and the effects last a week. Stuff to get me working harder, a week max. Things to clear my house space, lasts about a week.
Since my initiation I have been completely re-enthused for spiritual stuff and have jumped accidently into a whole new level of goddess conciousness. I’m far less worried about being a weirdo and much more concerened about staying in Goddess-brainspace (which I think of as Purple Mode – being a bit more aware of divinity than the average). Suddenly I am interested in how I can serve her as oppose to how she can serve me, what she wants me to get up to as oppose to what I want to get up to. I am interested in carrying out my dreams and plans not because I want to do them, but because I suspect she wants me to do them. And I promise I have never been keen on the idea of serving or doing the work of an invisible friend, no matter how much I liked them or believed in them. Gah!
I don’t know if this is a permanent thing, but I quite like it. I like knowing I have Her supporting me, even though I feel a bit weird and like a crazy religious person saying it. It’s nice having a bit more faith in the way things happen, and a bit more presence in the moment. I like feeling like I am allowing myself to pursue my spiritual goals and likes, rather than not letting myself as it’s too kooky (says the bellydancing mermaid artist).
So in conclusion, Hooray! I am awesome! I have achieved! and I am in Purple Mode!