As described before, I’ve been on a bit of a witchy rollercoaster of late.
I took a short holiday break in Glastonbury, and coincided it with a workshop with Z Budapest, which I was pretty dissapointed by, and lots of rambling up and down the Tor and down country lanes meeting squirrels and stuff, which was fabulous.
So, the morning after my workshop, I go up Glastonbury Tor to enjoy being up there and maybe to some meditating, who knows. But I am up there and I have cotton-wool brain – where I can’t focus on anything and you feel really scattered and grumpy like there is a fog that stops you interacting with the rest of the world. Grrr.
I came down the hill and went to Chalice Well Gardens. I loved it there, it was so pretty and gorgeous and peaceful. But I still had cotton-wool brain dammit.
So I went to find a bench on which to be grumpy and think useful, poignant things like “Why can’t I just enjoy myself?” and “Obviously I’m not meant to be a spiritual person because I feel like this” and “FaerieD, you suck”. I know, I know. Counter productive much?
I remembered something Franchesca de Grandis emphasises a lot in her work – constant purification. So I thought, well fuck it, if I ever need a purification ritual I need it now. So I concentrated on my breathing for a few minutes, then I sent the cotton-wool nonsense into the earth to be transformed into whatever the earth decided I needed at that moment.
And, for reals, cotton-wool brain was terminated and I was free and happy to enjoy my adventures, and I had a wonderful, spiritual, happy, amazing time.
Sometimes I wonder what I am doing following this spirituality gig of mine, when I was perfectly alright as an atheist before. Then a moment like this comes along where using practical witchery really improves my life and makes me happy, and I get it again.
It makes me happy.